Preaching to Myself

“I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:4

Have you been in a place in your life where you do your best to give it to the Lord? Let Him handle your fears? And then when He doesn’t deliver, feel forsaken?
I have had many fears over the years, in the last few years and then most recently in the past couple of months. Fears that I cannot share and choose not to share. Today some of those fears are still there, I told the Lord about them, begged Him to hear me, tried to do everything “right” and yet I have not been delivered from my fears. Instead they have increased. I feel forsaken…I don’t understand. I feel broken and want to be healed…it will take time, I know the pieces can be fixed.
I was thinking that Jesus has never told us, His children, that He needs to give us an explanation…He has just told us to trust, lean not on our own understanding, place our yoke upon Him, serve Him, KNOW Him, keep our mind on Him. My stomach is in knots knowing that I have no explanation to the why’s of my present situation…it’s in knots as the future hangs in the balance.

“The eyes of the Lord are upon the righteous, and his ears are open unto their cry.” Psalm 34:15

I had to keep reading that passage to be reminded in spite of my feelings of forsakedness (that’s probably not a word!) that God heard me and He still hears me.

“The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the Lord delivereth him out of them all. “ Psalm 34:19-20

God is still near. And I still have to believe that deliverance is mine because He says, “delivereth him out of them ALL!” I really can’t see God’s hand right now, I need to trust His heart.

“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. “ Romans 8:28
This present situation is for my good because I love God and this is a part of His purpose.

So, yes Lord I really don’t know what You are doing; but I don’t have to know it all…You don’t have to offer an explanation because You are God! Somehow, I will muster the strength to praise You, sacrifice my feelings of fear and praise You because You still love me and I still love You!